Its been three months today since you left me Christian and time is only getting harder. I hate not being able to hold you and touch you and hear your little laugh. I feel alone now without you,I have Carter but not you and now im broken. I would give anything in this world to have you back with me. No matter where I am Wv or home im all alone. Sure there are a couple good friends that have been there for me and listen to me when I need it or just whatever the case may be and I am so grateful for them, being away I miss them but im around support now and I dont always feel that there, I dont know maybe thats why I feel so lonely sometimes.
There is know worse pain then losing you my sweet Christian and any parent that is reading this that has lost a child knows exactly how it feels to be with out the one person you love most in this world.
I hate it that cancer has taken you away and that I only got to have 4 short years with you. Those were great years because I did have you but at the same time its not fair that, thats all you had.
Its hard when people look at me funny trying to find the right words to say or they feel awkard because im there, and what would be nice is if they would tell me something about you that I might know or even talk about something I do know. Stories is the one way I can keep here and alive.
Christian there is not a second that im not thinking of you and missing you...
Twinkle Twinkle Twinkle STARRRRR!!!!
I love you now and forever my sweet angel
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6 comments:
WHAT CAN ANYONE SAY TO THAT. I LOVE YOU AND IM ALWAYS HERE WHEN YOU NEED ME. I KNOW I CANT TAKE AWAY THE PAIN, NOONE CAN. BUT YOU CAN DUMP ON ME WHEN YOU NEED TO! I LOVE YOU!!
Amy,
I will be thinking of you today....
Hugs,
Lucia m/o ^Paulina^
Hi,
I was thinking of you guys today. If you need to talk you know you can call here . Anytime .. day or night .. it is never a bad time ,it is never too late. I am HERE !
kiss and pinch Carter for me , DONA
Ι'm very proud for you. For the strength you have, for your actions, for your words... I'm sure that Christian saw you and your rest of your family and he's proud too!
Euaggelia from Greece.
Amy, Nobody can help take your pain away and words won't bring Christian back. As I learned not with the passing of a child but of my dad time does help. It's awful hard and it seems like it's never going to get better. It shouldn't for a long while. It is the price we pay for loving someone soooo much. For as much as it hurts I feel so lucky to know I had someone in my life that I loved that much. My dad died many years ago and I still feel cheated today. When something good happens to me I want to share it with him and I can't. I used to break my feelings down into minutes because the days were just so long and evevtually I was able to string along longer periods of time. I keep my dad alive with stories and I love when people share them with me. We can keep Christian alive with our memories and slowly the tears will be replaced with a smile. We know he is looking down on us. Three months isn't a very long time. I felt like I was in a fog for the first year. The more care we give to a person the more they take from us. We feel like we lost part of us because we were so used to taking of them.. You did a remarkable job with him. You are a remarkable person. For as cliche' as it is God knew who could take care of him even for only a short while. I don't understand it. I just have to believe it.
Good morning Amy. Thinking of you and of Christian, and I wanted to come by and say "Hello".
I'm glad you made it to Relay.
You remain in my thoughts and prayers.
~Heide
m/o ^Jessica^; forever 17
http://caringbridge.org/visit/jessicarandall
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